hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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