Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
