dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
