Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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