She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
