So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Do vagina's smell?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I can't put those talents on a resume
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I think I just shit out all my problems.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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