You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
