Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
