Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
