If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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