Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Church boner. Awkwardddd
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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