I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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