why didn't you poke me back
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I need to sanitize my soul.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
