This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
