Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible