Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband

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  (703): I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband http://tfl.nu/pijn
  Replies (91) Good night (17861) Bad night (1003)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?

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  (910): dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her? http://tfl.nu/5pe0
  Replies (39) Good night (7406) Bad night (1722)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!

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  (304): STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us! http://tfl.nu/rgw4
  Replies (31) Good night (8252) Bad night (1003)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.

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  (980): You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls. http://tfl.nu/1jxr
  Replies (12) Good night (2161) Bad night (3340)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.

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  (651): I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed. http://tfl.nu/6al2
  Replies (17) Good night (4144) Bad night (1232)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.

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  (612): Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home. http://tfl.nu/ms67
  Replies (3) Good night (1962) Bad night (817)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone

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  (336): I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone http://tfl.nu/escl
  Replies (6) Good night (1368) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey

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  (508): He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey http://tfl.nu/jy2i
  Replies (11) Good night (1776) Bad night (595)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.

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  (573): He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady. http://tfl.nu/txg0
  Replies (6) Good night (2625) Bad night (641)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I need to hump something and I know u understand.

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  (843): I need to hump something and I know u understand. http://tfl.nu/eg48
  Replies (3) Good night (1272) Bad night (577)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.

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  (605): I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with. http://tfl.nu/3qb7
  Replies (5) Good night (820) Bad night (452)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again

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  (240): All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again http://tfl.nu/54xi
  Replies (5) Good night (1446) Bad night (453)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.

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  (615): No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day. http://tfl.nu/93vi
  Replies (3) Good night (741) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt

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  (757): I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt http://tfl.nu/qfiy
  Replies (4) Good night (894) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"

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  (915): You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!" http://tfl.nu/qdea
  Replies (1) Good night (468) Bad night (226)

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