Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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