I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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