absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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