It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
