the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
