stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
