You're my little dorito
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize
