hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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