Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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