Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
