Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
