You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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