im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
