Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
What changed your mind?
Being sober
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize