matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
