We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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