Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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