Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
You smell like stripper and shame
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Randomize
