i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
birth control should be required to get into college
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
