Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town