Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
no. you can't hotbox the world.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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