His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Randomize