ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
