If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think I died a long time ago.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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