yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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