glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
