Sry I called you an 8
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
my sisters under your porch take her home
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
