Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
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