i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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