Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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