I CAN MOONWALK!
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
