In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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