Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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