Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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