i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize